Happy Christmas

SOOOO......my kids are even asking why haven't I "blogged".  I guess to be honest.....I'm just finding "me here".  Does that make sense? I certainly don't want to bore you with my "adventures" with my everyday nonsense.  I want you to enjoy my new experiences through my eyes.

Honestly....this year has been challenging in many ways. But I am glad to have made this move.  I am now far from contact of old friends, but making new friends in different ways. I feel lighter and happier, healthier. I needed to make a change.   Believe me...my choices for my life have not come without consequence and judgement. But it IS my life and most importantly my health. I am optimistic that the sun, my barre class, and walking my dogs at the beach year around will prevent me from being in a wheelchair in my future.  My children are here, I'm feeling better than ever and each day offers another way to learn all about the amazing opportunities here to experience life in so many ways. I am looking forward to 2015.

2015...what is my wish for me? My wish is......stay tuned


stay tuned

Changes

I've been in this kind of funk thing for the past week..trying hard to shake it but also embracing it as a change within me.  I love it here. ABSOLUTELY.....but still finding my way and sometimes....it's a little tough in some ways.  But I get through....just like I always do.

So.....best part of my day.  (Eyeopener and a big hug for me.)  I was walking home from the beach with Mali. A little girl ran up to Mali and hugged her screaming with delight.  Of course....Mali was afraid...she's not used to little kids and ran off.  The little girl was sad that Mali wouldn't let her pet her.  So I did the whole how to approach a dog talk with her Mom and the little girl.  And all was better.  A woman was watching me and said to me....."I remember you" and went into what she remembered about what I had told her about moving here.  I met her after just a few weeks here and obviously made an impression in some way. She mentioned my blog and said she sees me walking all the time and loved my confidence, my air of belonging and the sense of freedom she saw in me. WOW....really?  She said she was inspired by me and looking for her own changes with her life. A wonderful compliment. This woman made my whole week!!  So.....I've made a new friend, I am out of my funk and apparently I am officially an Obeachian.  What more could a girl ask for?  ;)

Her daughter asked me if I knew about the blue disk animals at the beach. Nope....I hadn't seen them but I would find out for her. They are called Sailor Jellies just like your Mom said.  They don't usually make it to shore but because they follow the warm waters and the wind moves their little sails they have ended up closer to shore.  They can't survive on land so if you see one.....throw it back into the water so it can live. I hear they glow at night and cast an amazing blue pathway along the waters edge.

I can't believe I am 55 and still continuing to "grow up".  I believe that this move has helped me as a person in more ways than I ever imagined.  How?  Courage.....I knew I was strong but I never understood until recently. But to be honest....strength is something that comes naturally to me.  I'm a survivor. You do what you gotta do and keep on trucking......with your chin up and with a smile. Secondly.... I have gained more street smarts for sure.  A whole new respect for the world outside of northern VA has opened up and with a little help from my new friends.....I am much wiser.  I have a huge respect for some of the people I've met here.....huge respect for the passion of this town.

I wake up each day to make sure my kids know I love them, do a good deed, learn something new, do something healthy for myself, and write down what I am grateful for at the end of each day.  I've done it for years.  Sometimes I don't do all of them......but I always do at least 4 of them each and every day.  Some people I know struggle with being a better person or making changes....These 5 things.....will make a difference.  And the best thing....they are easy!

Basically.....maybe we all have to grow up anyway......whether we like it or not.  But I am sure enjoying the roller coaster ride!! Always an adventure for sure!!

Yep.....it's been a while.

So...I have been trying to figure out where I'm going with this whole blog thing now that I'm here in San Diego. Right now...... I am just going to write about my life, my thoughts, my new experiences. A journal.....just as I intended it to be.  If you read it .....or not....it's okay......I seem have people who like my story so I am happy to share it.

Summer was busy, getting settled, visitors, etc......now we are settled for the most part and it's beginning to feel like home. Thank goodness summer is over, the summer vacationers are gone and life has begun to get real again. The days now have a regular rhythm for most of us and it feels good.

For all of you that wonder.....Yes....I do get lonely sometimes.  But it's okay.  Fortunately I like being with me and discovering what I am capable of.  I have grown here in a short time in good ways.  Life is changing.....for the better. And I find that I am doing that whole grateful thing again.  Counting not only my obvious blessings each day.....but my little "me" grateful things.  Things are all falling in place and I am actually doing better than ever and so are my children.  I guess there truly is a light at that long dark tunnel after all.  I thank God and my angel every day for helping me along the way. AND..

I just want to let each of you know how much I appreciate all your support and love during this hard and crazy journey of mine.  You have NO idea how much all your letters and comments have meant to me !!  I am happy!!

Big hugs and look forward to the new adventures of summer gal!! Cuz it's always summer in San Diego!! ;))

Reflecting on the past 2 months......

"In every walk with nature ..one receives far more than he seeks"__Muir

I'm still in awe and wonder about my new home. I can't believe I have been here almost 2 months already.  I have learned a lot about myself and about my new surroundings. My morning walks to Dog beach have been therapeutic for both me and Mali and we have formed a bond that is very special. You dog lovers understand that kind of connection for sure. Of course, I still miss my walks with Sandi...but Chase and I drive the dogs down and I get to enjoy watching her play in the surf with Mali a couple times a week in the evenings. She actually smiles ear to ear!  I am glad she is going to live out her last days in such a dog friendly place.

I have befriended a local artist here in town.  Kip.  He hand paints signs with quirky little sayings and works at the Green Store.  He's been here 26 years...from LA...and his signs are all over town.  We talk most mornings for a few minutes on my walks with Mali and  he throws me little tidbits about OB.  It's become one of the highlights of my mornings because he knows things about the town you can't read online.

 All the streets are named after naturists, authors, preservationists and ecological thinkers.  Just along Voltaire Street.  So I mentioned before I was going to learn a bit more about the folks these streets are named after.

Froude...one street down.  One of my favorites quotes of his "You cannot dream yourself a character; you must hammer and forge yourself one."  Boy have I learned lesson the long and hard way.  So true.

One of my favorite streets....Muir Street.  Another naturalist, said..."When we try to pick out anything by itself...we find it hitched to everything else in the universe."  I had to think about this one a bit.....but it's true.  Think about it.

I have also befriended a homeless woman with a little dog who lights up when she sees me most days.  Just loves being acknowledged and said hello to.  Maybe one day I'll learn her story. So many many homeless in San Diego.  Saw a family of six with an infant in Point Loma.....so sad.  I don't take my journey here and my life here for granted at all......I am so grateful for this opportunity to look at this sunset every night, be with my children, my dogs ...the beautiful weather each day.  I am feeling healthy and happy and I am so excited about the future.

6 Weeks....hard to believe.....but not really.

 Life here is still a little surreal.  I really miss home in VA sometimes,  the familiarity....the routine, my friends.  It's lonely sometimes for sure.  We are finally in a routine and busy everyday. I still can't get passed the reality that I actually live in a place that feels like vacation.  Why would I ever have to go on a beach vacation?

 I do know....I don't like the people invasion of summer vacationers.  I thought I was out of the loop being here in OB.....NOT the case.  EARLY morning walk with Mali and late sunset visits with all three or it's just too crowded with the dreaded weekenders or tourists.  Yes.....I'm becoming an official OB local.  Love it!  Nice  that we live away from all the crowds but within walking distance to avoid having to drive around forever to find that rare parking spot.

 Meeting new people, job search is going really well and I am feeling good. For me it's all about connection.  I've found my new grocery stores and my favorite farmers markets and a few new favorite restaurants.  I've made some new friends. The best part about being here besides the beautiful weather and how good I feel about me is the simplicity of this lifestyle.  I have learned to live with so much less....it's okay for now.   I need my family, my pups, healthful food for all of us, transportation, a home , my health and extra for when we need it.  I am so appreciative especially after what I have seen this summer.   I'm feeling so good about my new little home and I do think I will be staying here for a long while....it's perfect for me.

Happy 4th

Best news ever....Ellie has been found!!!!  It's been weighing on my mind, feeling helpless and that thank God people are good.  She is safe. :))))

Chase had a couple friends here these past few days.  Their visit started with him having severe food poisoning ..long story.  But I have realized that Chase is a trooper like his Mama.  Chin up and even after throwing up non stop for hours...managed a smile and a positive attitude.  Yes, I was worried. So here it is...2 days later and he's himself again.  Playing the ukelele, joking around, and even while he was feeling like crap ...he kayaked and snorkeled and jumped out of a plane......thankful he bounced back so quickly.  I sure loved having Ethan and Darryl here.  I could do my whole nurturing thing ;)

Lindsay and Chase both have great friends that I know they will be friends forever with.  I envy that.  I was sick early in high school and missed out on that lifetime connection.  But I've found some awesome friends in my adult hood and they have been such special gifts.  I'm grateful for my life and the love I have in it every day.  I can't wait to meet some folks to call my friends here in SD.  I have one...she's awesome.  But....that's okay for now.  Sunset was beautiful......hanging with my pups to make sure they are okay with the noise from 3 different firework displays.  Happy 4th......Be safe......enjoy the ones you are with!! <3

Settling in...learning the life here

For some reason,  here in San Diego people find a need to pile up rocks.  They call it "stacking".  I read that it symbolizes a desire to manifest a connection in our every day life, to bring the sacred into every thought, feeling and action.  If you think about it....if this little building of an altar makes someones life a little better......so be it. They are all beautiful in their own way.

I look at them as I have my life.....one step at a time. Balance.  Building blocks.  A big stone, then a little stone and then maybe a medium stone, etc.  I prefer the big stones! ;)

Anyway,  5 weeks here....ups and downs but I'm glad to be here and feeling better than I have in many years.  I have learned to live here means to live simply.  Buy what you need and make the most of what you have.  Huge support for the local merchants and farmers.  I have loved hearing the stories from the farmers markets merchants.  So much talent and so much ambition and dreams......Inspires me to pursue my own ambitions and dreams...and that being true to yourself is so important....no matter what.

21 days today!

WOW!  It's hard to believe I've been here 21 days already.  They have been wonderful days of sunshine, exploring, lots of exercise, meeting new people, learning more about myself and having some really good one on one time with Chase.  It's so nice for Lindsay to be able to stop by and have dinner or just say hello!  This past week experienced the San Diego fair and went to the wine festival with Lindsay and Maureen (one of Lindsay's friends Mom) in Del Mar.  We had a nice time and I am looking forward to getting together with Maureen again for HH or dinner. Lots of dog beach adventures.  I love to watch how the tide changes each day and the way the water pools and makes patterns in the sand.  It's my thinking time and I really enjoy my mornings there with Mali. Chase and I drove down a bit to experience beautiful Sunset Cliffs.  Breathtaking! Then followed the coast to Seaport Village to have a nice lunch by the water and window shop a bit.  The BEST day this week was kayaking in La Jolla.  I was a bit nervous about getting through the surf but I DID IT!!  It was SO fun...I really enjoyed it!  Such a beautiful place too....one of my favorites here. We got to see sea lions up close and had spotted leopard sharks swimming right under us.  The water is so clear and blue here....just beautiful!  So peaceful.  2 hours on the cove and I actually caught a wave in .....it was awesome!!  Spent the evening with Linds and her boyfriend Eric ....dinner and dog beach.  The dogs are in heaven here and so is their Mama.  No movers yet but that's okay.....I have all I really need for the most part...although.....I do want my clothes, oils and my CAMERA!!!

I have people in my life going through some tough times right now.  I am really glad that each of them are staying positive and having faith.  You have to. Sometimes God gives us learning lessons, struggles, to help us to grow.....learn.....and listen.  It can be trying, frustrating and downright awful going through life......but if I've learned that if you do have faith, listen, be kind, and have courage, take chances..and keep putting one foot in front of the other.....things usually...not always but usually work out the way they should.....and with you even better than you were before!! <3  You are in my prayers each day.....Hugs.

Watching the day winding down here from my kitchen table....the silhouettes of the palm trees are one of my favorite parts of the day as the sun begins to set.  Missing those I love and wishing you all a nice weekend.  I am keeping the faith that I will hear from my moving truck tomorrow.....Happy Weekend!!  :)))

Day 10 here on the West Coast

   Hard to believe that we have been here for 10 days already! My daily walks with Mali take me down my street of Voltaire and I see his quotes written here and there on buildings, signs, etc. I wanted to know who he was, googled him and found he was a French writer, historian and philosopher famous for his wit, his advocacy of freedom of religion, freedom of speech, and separation of church and state.  I've also realized that many of the streets here are named after writers, poets and philosophers. I am also learning about the history of this little town. Looks like I'll be brushing up on my history a bit! 
   Our weather right now is called the "June Gloom" which means that it's gloomy and cool in the mornings until about noon or later.  Definitely chilly.  
   Tonight is Taco Tuesday all over the city with $2 tacos at most restaurants....so that's what we will be having for dinner tonight!  Fish tacos for me!!  So yummy!
   Praying the movers get their truck fixed and get the heck outta Texas and on their way here....taking it in stride.  Nothing I can do. In the meantime, going to enjoy my down time and get to know my new town.

    

one day at a time

Yep...story of my last 6 month journey. Settling here and no turning back.  Still no moving truck, or my car, AND Chase's car broke down today...just what I needed.   Finding my way in this little town, trying to make my home my own with little funds, groceries, pet food and still unable to start working due to no belongings.  Living the simple life to say the least. My sanity is truly  my morning beach trips with Mali and exploring my surroundings meeting everyone I can. She is a delight to so many people she meets on our little adventures and that makes me smile.
There weather is perfect, I am within walking distance to anything I would need, get to watch fireworks every night, have my dogs and my children here.. but,  feeling a bit lonely, a bit overloaded financially, but also feeling I'll be okay once I can start working.  It's definitely a bit scary but.....I do like it here.  The dogs are in heaven. But, I feel like I am living in someone else's house....which I am.  I hope to make it my own with time.  Bought my first ceramic pot from old town yesterday, its yellow with red and blue flowers....so pretty ...planted some herbs to inspire me to start cooking again.  Lots of bearings still to be found for me.  Feeling lonely and missing my routine and friends.   But.....learning to start a new here and doing okay.  One day at a time. Right?

Parrots?

I  woke this morning to the boisterous chatter and screeching of parrots!?  Apparently decades   ago  they ( wild green and red crowned parrots) were released from a pet store or individual and  have multiplied in the wild here in the Ocean Beach/Point Loma area.  They are mostly seen and HEARD in the early mornings and the evenings.  Another thing that adds to the character and charm of this little town.
Mali has gotten a bit more comfortable at Dog Beach....still looking for her new bff.  Awesome today....quiet and low tide.  She had a blast.  Chase and I are both tired today....guess coming down from everything.  Really been busy trying to find my lost Ellie from here.  Many phone calls and emails.  Good news is....have my first interview on Thursday morning.  No clothes here yet so looks like I'll be shopping for some bargains tomorrow so I look decent.  Dang gone movers!!

A dog lovers paradise!!

I get to walk 7 blocks down to this beautiful beach every day and let my dog run and socialize with all kinds of dogs. Many of the residents and shop owners put out bowls of water for the dogs in town so on our way to and from the beach they can have fresh water.  As soon as I get to the beach...leash is off and there she goes.  I find it really interesting to watch the interactions between the dogs.  For instance....a dogs ball is his/hers and another dog respects that.  Mali is learning so much from just watching and joining in, trying, and it makes me smile. She is such a good girl and I am thankful for choosing her for making this journey with me. She will be my beach baby through my next 15 years and a dedicated one.

We made it!!

44 hours, 2727 miles in 4 days......what a beautiful country we have!!  Neither one of us slept in the car because we didn't want to miss a thing!  Change was crazy fast with the terrain.  So glad I did this. ....everyone should travel cross country at least once in their life.  Such an amazing experience!  So, we landed and Linds had everything set for us so I didn't have to go to the grocery store, etc.  Toasted with champagne....new beginnings and getting here safely. Still can't believe I am here.  Surreal.  First whole  day here and started with a long shower with no hurries, appreciating my view and catching up on email, etc. Took Mali to the dog park.  She had so much fun!  Such a little social gal....like her mama.  Explored the town a bit and met my landlord, had my walkthrough.  Feeling good about this place and thinking I might stay longer than I planned. This town is a throwback in time....cool little shops, hippies that have remained hippies from the 60's, painted vans,  organic markets, everyone has a dog....really laid back and I find the character of the town very interesting.  Good place to find some grounding again. Finding my way in the last 24 hours already.....burgers on the grill tonight and getting ready to watch fireworks courtesy of Sea World  from my living room!! Moving truck comes tomorrow........Busy day once again but excited to make this place my own!

Map of where I live.  You can see the dog beach, I live off Voltaire about 7 blocks from the beach......up high to see everything....it's a bit hilly here.  Feeling excited.

Day 3.. enjoyed our drive through texas!!

Much better day!  Didn't start out so well..while loading Mali and Fritter into the car this morning I locked the keys in the car with them in it.  Couldn't believe it!  Billy Craig, a local in town, came to our rescue within 15 minutes and we were on our way by 8!!  Speed limit was 75, a beautiful day and ready to make up for some of the time we lost yesterday.  20 minutes down the road I get pulled over for going 81 in a 75.  Apparently "Texas has no tolerance and you must drive the speed limit."  He scolded me and let me go....really?  6 miles over on a highway?  The rest of the trip went smoothly..the dogs were awesome and slept most of the way.  Potty breaks were tough again.  No where to stop and red ants and trash everywhere for miles.  The first half of Texas the rest area was beautiful....after that.....there were none.  Enjoyed watching the change of scenery crossing the state.  We decided to make it to El Paso because it was basically the first place after crossing the desolate eastern terrain.  So after 12 hours and 760 miles we landed in El Paso, TX.  They don't waste any space here that's for sure.  Hotel is right next to the highway and Mali is fascinated with the lights and and the cars whizzing by.  I said to Chase today "Do you think the dogs think the car is their new home?"  I know they must be confused but they have been troopers and settling in to all the changes each day.  Tomorrow we drive through a bit of New Mexico and cross Arizona and into Cali to our final destination in Ocean Beach, CA.  738 miles to go and another long day ahead. This awesome team can do it again tomorrow and we will be very happy to finally be there.

Day 2....NOT as smooth going as we'd hoped.

Headed out this morning at 8 am confident to make it to Fort Worth, TX....the dogs weren't too excited about getting back in the car. Made it to Memphis in rush hour and somehow missed a turn and found that we had gone around the Memphis beltway and were head back on 40 E.  Thank goodness I realized it, got back on track and only lost 25 minutes.  Finding the rests areas a blessing for the dogs.  Sandi is have a terrible time getting in the car and ended up with my first battle would of the trip when I tried to help her up. Tennessee was beautiful and I enjoyed driving through it.  However, Arkansas is not a state I can to venture through again.  The roads are the worst I've seen and construction much of the way through.  Sat in stopped traffic for 30 minutes and continued slow traffic for a long while. Lots of rain, All rest areas are closed throughout the state, and nowhere to stop for long periods of time.  The dogs were restless and we were losing so much time.  Found a tiny gas station with a small area of grass...very wet grass.  Mali broke free of here leash, very scary but a nice lady finally grabbed her.  Another 1/2 hour lost.  Anyway.....you get the picture.  Needless to say after 11 hours and only 600 miles we are spending the night in Mt Pleasant, TX.  Landed in a La Quinta Inn and Suites....For $109 have a really nice 2 room suite like a little apartment.  I'm going to enjoy a couple minutes by myself to take a shower and be able to close the bedroom door and keep the dogs in the living room.  Yay!! It was a long trying day for us at times but at least we made it to Texas!!  Tomorrow we drive through this state and praying for sunshine and an easier day with my adventures to share!!

Cross country trip Day 1

After a very long emotional and crazy weekend....7:30 this morning Chase and l loaded the 3 dogs and started our long drive out to our new home. As we got onto 66W we both looked at each other "Wow, we are really doing this!"  Fritter was the only one that misbehaved today. I will have to give him a little extra meds tomorrow. The dogs are very confused but I think I will get easier for them with each day.  So after 9 hours 50 minutes and 617 miles we made it to our first stop in Lebanon, Tennessee just outside of Nashville. We had to stop a bit more for the dogs ......hopefully tomorrow we can do  a bit more.  I picked up a yummy dinner from the restaurant next door and finally everyone is settling in. Headed to Fort Worth tomorrow.  Will sleep good tonight.  Thanks for all the sweet and loving notes from all of you.

What a whirlwind......2 more days until blast off.

Crazy week filled with hard work, a little chaos, catching up with friends and family and still not done.  How did I gather so much "stuff".  Purple heart is loving me right now but my trash men are NOT.  Seeing my family tomorrow for a send off celebration and looking forward to seeing everyone. I have to admit....I'm exhausted and feeling pulled in many directions.  But I'm only one person....so my focus blinders have gone on. Sorry I didn't get to see everyone. :(  Doing this alone has been a challenge emotionally and physically...but it's been a journey that I'm glad I had. Ready for new beginnings and taking lots of deep breaths along the way.

"We’re all travelling through time together, every day of our lives. All we can do is do our best to relish this remarkable ride."

5 days and we are OFF on a new journey.

WOW!!  Anxious and excited at the same time.  It's been a bit crazy ......I had no idea what a big move it truly is. I really appreciate all your support and giving me that little push I need now and then to keep on trucking!!  A little emotional with all the goodbyes to friends, family and everything that is familiar.  But feeling grateful about getting a chance to live a life that's not so hectic,  one that's healthier for me in so many ways, meet new people, and find a job while I go to school to follow my passion.  I'm excited to explore ME and what I am capable of.  And I still get to have my kids close by to nurture my cooking spirit and try lots of new recipes.  I can't wait to finally be done with this move,  make the long trip there with Chase and my spirited dogs (who have know idea what's going on) and LAND at my new home.  That day will mark a new beginning.  I will count my blessings for sure.

Mothers Day

                                                                                  

17 days....WOW.  It's becoming real and a bit scary but exciting too.  This past week has been a bit crazy and emotional.   Everyone keeps telling me how brave I am....I don't really look at it that way.  I look at it as something I have wanted to do for a long time....and I need to.  No regrets...right?  Life is short. As I packed up all my belongings I stumbled upon all the love notes and cards Lindsay and Chase have made. Oh and the "I'm mad at you" notes...or the "I'm sorry" notes... the "confession" notes, those were the best.  Miss those times.  What treasures those are.   My children have taught me more about myself than I could every imagine...they have no idea.  

The saying above says it all. I am so looking forward to our new adventure and I am so very proud to be their Mom.  Happy Mothers Day!!

23 days we set out!

My weekend was full of visits and thought provoking conversations.  I am grateful for those who understand my choice in this and are supportive and excited for me...because....I am excited . I have a plan and well.....no turning back now!! 

30 days and stuck in this house for the first 2.

The rain tumbles down and cleanses all these allergies away for a bit. YAY!!   Everyone loves a rainy day to have some to be a little lazy.  So happy to not be out pounding the pavement trying to get sales on days like this. Instead I get to make my new plan that I am really excited about.  In addition, I have learned my dogs sleep a lot more than I thought.  That's a good thing for our trip out west. I have loved hearing the excitement in my children's voices and all the plans they have.  I know I have made a really good change in my life...and in theirs.  I've had a chance to catch up with life.....emails, phone calls, planning lunch dates etc.  It's been interesting seeing how this is all happening.  I have to say I'm  feeling supported, loved and I really appreciate those of you who are helping to make my transition easier. It's very cool.  Looking forward to seeing some of you in the next couple weeks.  Feeling way more confident and well....excited!!!  I really am and not feeling guilty about it!!!

ugh.....getting harder to say "I'll see you later"

I never imagined the heartache I would actually feel leaving.  There are many hurdles in this moving adventure that I didn't count on.  I know I'm strong enough. Just taking deep breaths...a day at a time and diving in ..the next 3 weeks with people I care about so much..all  the hugs, kisses, laughs... I will treasure every single moment.  You are all very very precious to me. You have helped to make me .....well...me. And I hope to see you soon!!

Someone very special to me gave me a gift tonight and I'd just like to share something that made my heart feel good.  <3

 (:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5C93XDE6qtw

Everything is getting real.  Kind of scary.  So this weekend starts my final visits here on the east coast.  I never look at it as a good bye....it's more of an"I love you and I'll see you soon" visit.  A hard one is coming up this weekend. My other Mom. If I've learned anything from this move ..it's the meaning of time.
"Time" is so important to pay attention to.  Time gets away from all of us..have those special moments when you can. Most importantly when the day ends and you count your blessings.....it's so much better when you have the connection and your able to come HOME.
I am headed out soon to make a new home.....scary?  yes...but I think once I get there....it's going to kind of make it's own story.  Deep breathe for sure.

one month, two days

So... I have sold, given away and donated my furniture, belongings and 2 of my pets.  And I know most of you will probably find this very silly.....but I don't.  Someone is picking up my kitchen table tomorrow to a new home.  I cannot tell you how many hours I have spent here.....looking out my bay window while working, studying, talking to those I care about....etc.  This table has a huge history...if it could only speak!  For 25 years...I have made thousands of meals, had many heartfelt talks, raised my children, had wine nights with my girls, have had to answer "those" difficult questions, family meetings, and the list goes on.  It's weird....I never thought I'd be attach to a piece of furniture but find out it's sort of sad for me. I am glad the gal that's taking it loves it and so it continues to have more dinners and conversations and bring joy.  One day I'll buy a new table to start a new history love and memories...Until then  I am grateful to have a bridge table and fold up chairs for the next month!!  I'll have to put a little padding on mine to sit on but that's okay.....that's what towels are for!!  Appreciate what you have......Life is precious! <3

final month

Wow....it's been a busy but thinking time for me.  This past week I had to come to terms that I am leaving the people in my life that are my family and my friends along with my daily hellos and hugs that have supported me and helped me over many years.   My simple but sometimes crazy life routine is going to change. I'll have new friends to meet. New places to frequent ....but I will still stay in touch with my friends and family here. I am so thankful for the internet so that we can all keep in touch for sure. I hope to be back at least once a year so I can catch up with everyone!! And you are all welcome to visit me whenever you're out this way.   I have also been touched by the true words that have come from those close to me. ...and I'm wondering why it takes some sort of grand event for the people close to you to say what they mean.  It really shouldn't be that way. Counting my blessings in many ways.

We all make our choices.....I chose to continue to grow.

Today was a hard day for me.  I am realizing that I can't be hurt by the way people chose to  react to my leaving.  This doesn't mean I won't still be in their life. These days there are so many ways to stay in touch.  Its awesome....helps me to know I can stay connected to those I love and care about.  We all need to keep growing in every way that we can, do our good deed for the day and cherish all that we have.  I am sorry that my leaving may cause hurt....but I'm still here to talk to anytime......I am always here for a kind word, a shoulder or a laugh.....I'm not going to feel guilty about doing what I need to do or making a better life for me and mine.  Thanks for all the support.....grateful today for the sunshine on my face and the ability to challenge my body in one heck of a barre class, and being able to help out a few people in my life that matter to me.  Oh and Mali is rocking the leash....leaps and bounds.  I love ending each day with a good deed for making someone smile and an accomplishment in whatever shape or form.....My next goal is to read more...without falling asleep by the 4th page... :)

New beginnings

Once upon a time someone told me that I see my world through rose colored glasses.  May be I do.  Looking at the positive ahead and fulfilling my dreams has helped me to fight through the thick and thin of my life.  I used to think that comment was a negative but I know look at it as a "Hey....so what at least I'm living my life the way I choose too!"  And I'm happy.  I had to give up one of my pets this week...wasn't fun....lots of guilt but I know Kismet will be loved and well taken care of.  The house is under contract, my home no longer feels like my home .....and I'm feeling in limbo....sort of like camping out.  It's okay.  At least I have a roof over my head and a tv, computer and my kitchen appliances.  The emotional  is more than I ever thought.  It's way harder but I think that the excitement of new beginnings balances everything out. Today is Easter and it's all about new life, new beginnings....I spent it alone with my canines but that's fine with me.

WOW! Spring is finally here! Yay!!

Had my big moving sale today.  Of course folks were here by 7:15 am
 although it was posted to start at 8 am.   BUT....raised enough today to cover the shipping of my car....YAY!!  Perfect day....Sun was shining!  I was overwhelmed with the hugs and the love I felt today from the people within my community.  I guess after being here 25 years.....more people know me than I knew.  It was humbling to say the least.  Had 2 showings for the house today.......fingers crossed!!!  I thought that getting rid of all my belongings would make me sad.  But it didn't'.....it's just stuff. The people in your life is what matters. Paul and I had dinner with my brother Greg and his girlfriend Alyson.  Such a good time.  It was really the first moment it hit me and I got all choked up.  I'm going to miss my family, my home, the familiarity.......but it's okay.  Good things ahead!

Spring has sprung!! YAY ..finally!

My daffodils have bloomed  and it's the beginning of spring. Halleujah!!! My home has so many phases of growth among the plants..so fun to watch......and over the years the changes among of the people that live here.  Bittersweet.....although....I will NOT miss the fall leaves.

I woke up this morning in a panic.  OMG...in a little over a month I have to leave my little safety net here and begin again.  I'm having a moving sale on Saturday to give away the last 10 years of my life. ....It'll be fun.....making someone smile, I'm a sucker at yard sales.  I'd rather have things go to someone that loves it!  Then.....I guess.....the rest goes to charity and life will change.  That's okay......good things ahead.  Today....It was the first day it was a little scary....but onward and forward....right!!

So I made it through my double nickel day! It's okay!

I don't know about you but I don't really pay attention to New Years.  For me, I take inventory of my life and make goals on my birthday each year.  Yes I turned 55 this year. It's okay. I feel good about this past year.  I ended a three year battle of debt, YAY, and so happy to be free of that. I rescued 20 more puppies and adopted my Mali.  I took a break from rescue to give my heart and my life a break.  I found my passion with what I career I want to pursue. I continue to make a difference in peoples life by doing a good deed every day and paying it forward....I'm now working with Tidal Wave ....an amazing organization. I made a decision to make a change for my life by moving and being with my kids to experience something new.  I'm excited for this year of being 55 and looking forward to sharing my new adventures.

It takes courage to do what you want, other people have a lot of plans for you, follow your bliss. ~Joseph Campbell

Less than 2 months!!!

So I'm understanding that folks are either not understanding my "big decision" or they are excited for me. This is big for me too, but I've always been very adaptable, found my own way, made friends easily....it's all good.  I'm going to miss my loved ones here and the "normal routine" of each day and the way it waves through the seasons.  I'm excited and I hope to be supported by those who care about me through this journey in my life.  I knew I'd live near the beach one day but never thought I'd have to go through so much in my life to get here....to my new home.  I had some very meaningful conversations over the past few days and it's made me feel very loved.  Fingers crossed for buyer traffic this weekend.  My birthday is on Saturday....55...wow....does that make me a senior citizen?  I feel fortunate to be healthy and making this new adventure!!  <3  

This weather is crazy depressing here. Goodbye winter.....I'm done with you!!  House went on the market on Friday and not a bite.  But hey...who wants to to go out when it's pouring rain and snow. Things have settled down now that packing is pretty much done.  Woke up this morning at 5 am, anxious about the cross country trip and that I only have two months here. Had a  much needed long talk with my Mom and realized that the excitement of starting a new life is okay.  It's my life after all!!  My worries about taking my pups cross country with Chase.....well....it's an adventure right?  We will do it the best way we can with humor and patience.  Prayers needed that the house sells soon.  (:  May the sun shine tomorrow!!!

To see a World in a Grain of Sand And a Heaven in a Wild Flower, Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand And Eternity in an hour.”   Wow can I relate to that!  House is officially on the market and I am praying that it's sold quickly.  Feel like I'm living in a hotel. None of my personal belongings around :(  But all it good......excited to start my new life.

After being so overwhelmed for so long.....I'm feeling grateful.  Of course each day I take a moment to thank God for my family, my friends,my health and that I have a roof over my head. I also make sure I make a difference in someones life everyday. Today was extra special.  My lease is signed, sealed and delivered!  I got to see my last snow come and go.  My car almost did not start today but alas.....it did. Got to do my good deed at Walmart!

 Best of all the sun is shining and good weather ahead.  House goes on market soon....exciting :)  The mud factor will be challenging with Mali but we can do it!!

I was thinking tonite.  Wow...how am I going to meet people? Being in a small town like Ocean Beach and doing my good deed each day.....Folks will be like.....there's that lady with the dogs. She's so nice.  Maybe someone will pay it forward.

My whole life....I've lived to make sure everyone else was okay....now....it's my turn.  Feeling more excited than I have in a very long time. New beginnings are always good.  <3

Lots of folks are wondering why I am making such a big move. Simply, Its time for a change. It was so difficult finding a rental to take the 3 dogs.  But finally my prayers were answered and with the help of Lindsay have found the perfect place to stay during our transition.  I am moving because Lindsay is staying out there after law school to practice and eventually raise a family. Chase wants to transfer out there to attend school and follow his passion in Music.  Basically,  I'm feeling stagnant, life is so short and it's ready for a change.  So California ....here I come.  Myself,  Chase and 3 dogs traveling quickly cross country on May 27.  Should be interesting.  I'll need a big glass of wine on my new deck when I get there!!!  I'm going to be 55 and I want more for my life.    I start an online course soon to specialize training dogs with behavioral issues.  I'll work part time out there while building up my own business.  There's a dog beach 5 blocks from my new residence and I hope to make some new friends and maybe some clients at the same time.  I don't know anyone out there....but I'm looking forward to my new adventure. 

It's official!   I finally have a new address cross country in Ocean Beach!  Perfect for us.  Dog park, dog beach, skate board park, beach view from my deck, and fully furnished!!  Wow, wow, wow.....feeling so fortunate to have found this place. NOW I am excited......it's actually happening.  Yay, yay, yay!!!